I've been so excited to get started on these album spotlights. If you haven't been following along, not too long ago I released (most) all of my songs I had written and recorded from 2011 and prior in an album I titled, "From the Archives". Along with the release of the album, I announced I would be doing a 'spotlight' every so often here on my blog; highlighting one song at a time, going over lyrics, the story behind the song, and any other interesting facts surrounding the song.
Kicking it off is track number 1, Rain Falls Down. This song marks what was truly the first "real" song I ever wrote; with a solid structure, lyrics that didn't change every time I sang it, and the first one I really showcased.
I wrote this song in 2007 sometime around the middle of summer. Just a few months prior, my family and I had just returned home from Washington, where we had been living for the last, (almost) three years while my Dad was serving as a mission president for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Our return home was not the ordinary for a mission president and his family. It was abrupt, unexpected, and life shattering. We were supposed to come home in July, (around the time I had written this song), but instead we ended up coming home in March. We had about a three day notice after learning my Dad had been diagnosed with stage 4 Lymphoma. There was a tumor the size of a nerf football in his abdomen. He was quickly released from his calling and someone else was put in while we were sent home, back to Utah for him to begin treatments.
This was a very confusing time as a fourteen year old. I think it's safe to say these early teenage years lend themselves to being confusing, but these circumstances made them even more so. I was worried. My Dad was at an extremely high risk of not surviving this cancer. My life had been uprooted right before the end of the school year. I struggled with friends. And on this particular day, I had just learned that I didn't make it into the choir I had auditioned to get into that most everyone else I knew did get into. It felt at the moment like I had it harder than anyone I knew.
I don't remember what happened or what train of thought led me to this next part... but I began to have moments of thoughts of what life was like for others. And I knew I didn't have it worse than others. I knew there were people out there struggling more than I was; and at some level, it felt petty being so saddened because I didn't get into a middle school choir I wanted; even though it really did make me so sad.
I remember sitting at the piano, which faced directly in front of a large window in our front room. The room was gloomy. Outside it was completely gray and misty. I sat there looking out, and felt defeated. I felt sad, but I also felt frustrated at myself for feeling so sad. I knew things would get better. They had to. I knew I had little to complain about in comparison to other people. It didn't take away the sadness, but it did help me in processing that sadness which resulted in feeling even just a little less defeated.
I began playing a few simple notes on the piano. I let myself feel that sadness for a moment as I began to sing. As I sang I unknowingly was processing these conflicting thoughts and feelings in my lyrics. This was the first of many times I have done this throughout my life. I often feel the process of songwriting, if nothing else, always teaches me what I need to know and and helps me to understand. That's why all of these songs are so dear to me, as cheesy or quality lacking, as they may be, they each mark a time in my life where I went through something, processed it, learned from it, and was eventually able to heal from it. My songs are the markings of my life and I will be forever grateful for this experience, this first experience I ever had, in writing this way with Rain Falls Down.
Rain Falls Down
Sometime it feels all
Hope is lost and
Nothing can bring us up
But we need to understand
We're not the only ones who
Cry
And the rain falls down
Onto the ground
As I cry
And tears fall
From these eyes
All around to the ground
Although we're faced with trials
We don't have it as hard as others do
And we need to help them
Too
And the rain falls down
Onto the ground
As I cry
And tears fall
From these eyes
All around to the ground
Why do we cry
Why must we sigh
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh
And the rain falls down
Onto the ground
As I cry
And tears fall
From these eyes
All around to the ground
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